How do you make others feel special ?

It’s no secret  that all humans, irrespective of their age and gender love to feel special.

Also, it doesn’t matter how talented or beautiful or financial well off one is, the legacy they leave behind is how they made others feel.

I must admit I was a self absorbed man who thought I was the center of the universe until a decade ago. Life experiences changes us for the better. We grow and evolve from these experiences. Some don’t bother to change for their entire life. At least, we have an opportunity to change.

Those very few people who exist in my life is only because they made me feel valued. I had this obligation that I not only reciprocate to them but also make others aware the value of making someone feel special.

Most people often claim that the world has become so materialistic and selfish. However, we also choose to ignore those who have been kind to us. Most people take them for granted and then when you need them most, they won’t be around.

The practice of making others feel special not only applies to your personal relationship but also at a professional level.

Many believe that you only make that one person in your life feel special. I do not believe in this principle. I am also not suggesting that you don’t make your life partner feel special.

What I am not totally convinced about people’s approach is when they don’t care about anyone else when they are in their honeymoon period and they remember their close friends only when relationship is not working out. Nobody has any obligation to hear you out.

Making others feel special is not that easy especially as we have been brought up to think about ourselves first. Also, it goes beyond just remembering birthdays and anniversaries.

It is unfortunate that people have become paranoid about getting to know people because of past bad experience. Well, past is past. Sometimes, we do not recognize our own fault why relationships don’t work out. It’s perfectly okay. We have all been there. However, our past does not decide our future.

First and foremost, don’t make assumptions about anyone from whatever little you know about the person or what others think about them. Let not someone else’ interaction gone sour affect your relationship with a new person.

If you are not a great conversationalist, it is fine to just be a listener but show active interest in what someone has to tell you.

Make the conversation about the other person, even if you have got a lot to share yourself. Your turn will come. Just hearing them out without offering a single compliment will also make them want to connect with you more often.

There are so many hidden talents in the world one wonders why are they not famous as yet. If you know someone, a few kind words encouraging them to pursue their passion further will make them not only value themselves but you too.

I recall my work experience, when HR had organized a team building exercise, we were asked to speak out at least 3 positive traits of another person. I always thought everyone hated me, however I was surprised to hear kind words and I reciprocated too. It not only changed what we thought of each other, it also helped improve our work relationship.

If you are on social media, especially twitter, you would have noticed that though people have thousands of followers, only 1-2 people like their tweets and sometimes there is no interaction at all. The reason is people follow others just for the sake of it and there is no real engagement or even an effort to get to know each other.

Making someone feel special does not necessarily mean you have a romantic interest, unfortunately that is what most people assume.

Does anyone remember the good old e-mail ? I do.

Sending an email inquiring about people or just compliment them about a blog post or a recipe they posted will make them feel connected and encourage them to post regularly. All of us need that, don’t we?

It is an even better feeling when you write to someone you have not heard of for quite some time.

Another way to make people feel special is when they whole world has gone against them. Just let them know, you believe in this person and will always be by their side. If s/he is a human, they will show gratitude for you for the rest of their life.

And there is nothing better than a hug -even if it’s a virtual one 🙂