The reason I choose not to have any friends.

I did quite okay without any friends for over 25 years. Seriously !!!

The only period in my life I had any friends were school/college because I was it was mandatory to have friends even though I would have preferred to have lunch alone even then. However, they would hunt me down and join me for lunch, sometimes to steal food from my lunch box and I had to return the favor.

I had about 3 friends in college and after all the bull shit promises ‘We will keep in touch’ and all, they got married to beautiful woman and later forgot that I exist. So I took revenge as well. I got married to a beautiful woman as well and did not bother to connect with them until this thing called ‘Facebook’ became a part of our lives.

So after 15 years of disappearance ( I am assuming they got sucked in the Bermuda Triangle) they reappeared and after I created my Facebook account, I got friend requests one after the other.

Then the usual ‘Hello..How have you been?’ and the abuses for not keeping in touch, slowly and steadily they disappeared again.

I also shared with my friends that I am no longer and not doing good health wise. Later, frequency of interaction widened and then stopped completely. For a long time, they did not know they were no longer on my friends list.

Today, sometimes I feel embarrassed to even add anyone on Facebook because I have about 25 odd friends when most people I know seem to have 600+ odd.

Good thing about not adding too many friends is there isn’t much noise in my life that allowed me to focus on my start up project and that mattered to me the most.

While I struggled during the worst phase of my life, it would have made me feel worse when I saw pictures of others on holiday.

I have no regrets though.ย I believe the number of friends do not define who I am. Friends are only temporary. They are there for good times only. ย I became stronger than before and dealt blow after blow all alone.

On a similar post on Quora, few people commented ‘To have have to be a good friend yourself’.ย I know all that.

I know each one of us have different experience in life and we make our own choices.

The best lesson I learnt in life is blood is thicker than water.


44 thoughts on “The reason I choose not to have any friends.

  1. i like so much to read all about your written. You have a really wise vision about life…
    I also do not care about having too many “friends” on FB or in life … I learned to be alone and i am very confortable with that. Kisses from Brazil and thanks…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You describe your feelings very honestly Sudhir… And the healing process has begun. For me, friends are very important and I have some truly amazing people as friends. Your true friends will stay on in life and we shouldnot worry about those who leave… They are just aquaintances๐Ÿ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Absolutely correct. I choose solitude over bad friendships. It takes strength to stay away from people. If you are at peace with yourself and nothing more to prove to others, then others are envious of you because of what you have and your courage to choose to be alone.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Always been a loner, but made friends easily. But, it has taken me almost 60 years to come to terms with who i am. My biggest mistake was expecting the same loyalty and honesty that i gave others. Now i am in a good place and realise that i actually don’t need certain friends. I have three good friends and we are always there for each other, despite not living in each others pockets. We maintain contact but distance prevents us meeting up.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. blood is thicker than water…
    I agree with you that friend requests will come and go. Who is left..or who are left. that matters. I trust in those friends with whom I can talk freely even after a long gap.


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